Retirement Parties • Company Retirement Parties

Company Retirement Parties

By Nate Lee

The Tone.

A Retirement Party – whether you are putting it together, presenting, just attending, or even the honoree – is basically a eulogy for the living. So, to make it fun and memorable, meaningful and funny, think of it as a memorial service, of sorts.

What does that mean?

That means the company is formally thanking someone for his or her loyalty, devotion, and time – by far the largest percentage of his adult life. Not just thanking them either; the company is honoring people who have shown the characteristics that the company values.

That means you mix in all the elements of a life at work – humor, pathos, embarrassment, courage, accomplishment, dedication, vision, mistakes even – but you keep respect above all else.

Fortunately, unlike a memorial service, it also means you treat the future, too. Again, the honoree’s future should be treated with respect, too. Avoid the over-the-hill clichés of getting old, sitting around the house, getting in the spouse’s way.

Remember, you are imparting information to those who may not know certain aspects of the honoree, so find out what the future holds, and let everyone know.

Policy.

A company, no matter how big or small, should have one consistent policy regarding retirement parties – no less consistent than its rules regarding retirement itself.

In setting that policy, the company would be wise to consider that there is no better opportunity for internal relations. A wise executive would jump at the chance to extol the virtues that the retiree represents as a way of encouraging those virtues in other employees. In fact, it’s a no-lose proposition: those attending the party most likely like the retiree and are eager for the direction to be more like that person.

For that reason, it would also be wise for a company to consider that the lavishness (company’s expenditure) of the party should be directly proportionate to the number of years the retiree gave, and NOT (of course) to the corporate “rank” of the retiree. Come on! The upper-level manager’s retirement is already sweeter with the typical parachute. Do you really want to leave your employees feeling they are less worthy contributors to the company’s success? Not if you’re any kind of leader, you don’t. Again, remember the message you as a company are trying to put across: you admire and reward loyalty! Believe us, the cost of the party is far less than the cost of always training new employees.

So, whatever you do for a thirty-year manager, you do for a thirty-year secretary. Whatever you do for a twenty-year executive you do for a twenty-year guy on the line or in the field. Honor all by honoring ‘the least’.

Where?

Again, this may be part of the company policy. Offsite is better than onsite. Dinner is better than cocktails. Single is better than group. People other than company is not necessarily better than just company. Theme party is not necessarily better than just casual or even dress occasion.

Wherever it is, don’t make the mistake of thinking that you don’t need a small public-address system. After all, the retiree probably has friends who are hard of hearing.

Also, even if it is just cocktails, there should be a time and place for everyone to be seated so that the speeches can be made and heard easily.

Who?

See the piece on corporate policy to understand the reasons why, but the President or CEO should not only attend, but speak. It’s a good idea for the Chief to present something to the retiree; it doesn’t have to be a plaque or a check. It can be a symbolic gesture, something that means something to the guy speaking and, hopefully, the retiree.

It is the mark of an able executive that he or she would already know the honoree, and would have spoken with such a loyal soldier on more than one occasion. If you think this is not appropriate, you are wrong. Consider that no less than Queen Elizabeth showed up at a retirement party recently of a man who was one of the keepers of her horses. QEII is not known for fraternization with her subjects, so take a tip from this billionaire CEO and show up.

Other key people should be told ahead of time that they are expected to say a few words. Then, it is customary to open the floor up to anyone who wants to say something, much like a wedding (or, again, a funeral).

Some official company parties may include friends and associates from other times and places. They should absolutely not include children. The grandkids don’t need to know about Gramma’s office life.

By the way, even if the retiree wasn’t especially fond of certain employees – and even the most saintly of people have a few less-than-favorite folks – you must invite those employees, especially if it is a corporate-sponsored event. Let those folks decline; you can stay the bigger person. No matter what, though, if an employee worked with the retiree, a company’s best interest is in being inclusive.

No!!

Any embarrassing of the honoree should be good-natured and basically positive. No recollections of that Christmas party! No big business mistakes! No comments that may embarrass the family or, especially the wife, or really especially, any other attendees.

And that includes yourself. Don’t embarrass yourself. Don’t say anything that may get you fired or put on probation or shunned in the coffee room. Don’t say anything about the boss. It’s all good. It’s all positive. No venting! No negs! No wishing you were the retiree! You can say how you don’t know how the company is going to survive without the retiree! There are many variations on that theme that can be funny, positive, revealing, and complimentary.

Gifts.

Gifts are not a no-no. Guests should just know-know ahead of time what is expected of them. This should be needless to say, but you don’t collect money at the party. (You could collect cards of good wishes on them.) You shouldn’t be collecting money at all, but… again… company policy.

The kind of gift can be, but by no means must be, dictated by anyone or any theme. Joke gifts that can’t be used are just irritating pieces of junk. Why bother? Find some other way to amuse yourself. They need not be expensive: they can be cumulative, in a way. For instance, if the retiree is a fisherman, they can be lures, so that he receives dozens altogether. If the retiree gardens, everyone can bring a small plant to keep her busy. Try to avoid gift certificates. (Always!)

How.

If the everyday dress code of the company was something other than business or even casual dress, or if we’re not talking “corporate” world, per se, it may be appropriate to consider a less formal retirement party, possibly with a theme (see Theme Ideas).

No matter what, any party should be geared around speeches. Also, since there is no doubt someone, or even some department, that is well-versed in PowerPoint, a looped display of photos (that can include life outside of the company as well) that plays continuously throughout should be considered as important as the speeches.